Fran was helping me learn how to write again. It’s pretty hard to do actually. I can move my shoulders, but all I can do with my elbow is flex it, not go the other way. Plus I can’t move my hands or wrists at all.
To get me to write, Fran put this splint thing on my hand and wrist. It kept my hand from just flopping down. The splint had a hole in it that a pencil could go through. So I mainly had to concentrate on keeping my elbow bent and moving my shoulder so that the pen would move the way I wanted it. It was really hard! My handwriting looked like shit, but it was readable. If I wanted to get my GED, I had to be able to write.
Fran had me doing all these practice sentences on a piece of paper. It was pretty tiring work, but I was proud of myself. “You’re doing a great job, Ronnie,” Fran said. She’s so nice and encouraging of me. Fran didn’t know about me and Ned. Nobody did. If she knew, I think it would be bad. I always kind of got the feeling she had a thing for Ned too, but maybe that was just my imagination. Anyway, I know Ned’s not interested in anyone but me.
“Thanks,” I said. I was just glad we had more time to work on this before I had to go to the nursing home.
“Hello, Ronald.”
I looked up when I heard the voice. I think my jaw dropped open when I saw Julian standing over me, his arms crossed. I couldn’t even speak.
Fran raised her eyebrows up at Julian. “May I help you, sir?”
“Yes, you may,” Julian said. “I’m Ronnie’s uncle. I’d like a word with him, if possible.” He added, “Alone.”
Fran looked at me and I nodded to say this was all right with me. I watched her go and Julian took her empty seat. I still had the pen in my right hand splint, but I rested my hand on the table in front of me so I wouldn’t have to keep holding it up. The pen kept my hand at an awkward angle though.
Julian saw I was uncomfortable with the pen and he took it out of my splint for me. As I watched, he took my splint off too. My hand got all curled up and crippled-looking like it usually does without the splint on and Julian held it between his hands.
“What are you doing?” I said.
Julian gave me this long look. “I wanted to apologize, Ronnie. For the way I treated you the last time I was here.”
“It’s okay,” I said. It really was okay. I was pissed off at Julian when he first left me here. I felt like I was completely abandoned and no one would ever want to have sex with me again. But thanks to Ned, I had gotten over that. I wasn’t mad at Julian anymore, because I can understand why he wouldn’t have wanted to take on the responsibility of caring for a quad. It wasn’t Julian’s fault I got shot. Anyway, Julian wasn’t into me being a quad and all. He used to like me because I was young and pretty good looking and really into fucking, but I wasn’t what he wanted anymore. And that’s cool, I don’t mind.
“Look at you, Ronnie,” Julian said, shaking his head.
That was what he said last time he was here. I don’t even know what that meant. Look at me? I looked down and all I could see was myself in a wheelchair and my arms and legs kind of fucked up. I don’t what it meant when he kept saying that. It bugged me. “You were right,” I said, “I’m going to be a quad forever. It’s okay though. I can still do stuff.” I pointed my arm at the paper I had been writing on. “See? I can still write.”
“That’s fantastic, Ronnie,” Julian said. He was still holding my hand. “I’m really happy to see you’re doing so well. I knew you would.”
Julian’s face was so close to mine, I could see all the lines under his eyes. He was still pretty attractive for how old he was. “Why are you here, Jules?”
“I’m here because...” Julian took a deep breath. “I made a big mistake, Ronnie. I... I love you and I want you to come home with me. I want to take care of you for the rest of your life.”
I didn’t know what to say. I just stared at him.
“You’re all I can think about,” Julian went on. “All I can think about is fucking you, Ronnie. I don’t want anyone else. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get you back.” He bowed down his head. “I’m so sorry, Ronnie. Please forgive me.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Julian still wanted me. Even with the way I looked and all my needs, he still wanted me. It was crazy.
And I had to think about whether I wanted him back. I guess the answer was that I did. I liked Julian a lot. He was really sexy and always really great to me too. He treated me better than anyone ever had in my whole life and that includes my parents (especially my parents). And the sex was always really great too. Julian could suck me off like there was no tomorrow.
The only problem was Ned. I liked Ned a lot, probably even more than Julian, but I knew if I went back with Julian, it was over between me and Ned. I didn’t want that to happen. But really, how long could that last anyway? And Ned was the one who was always saying how I should get my diploma, and being in a nursing home would make that so much harder. Really, the truth was, I was scared shitless about getting put in a nursing home and I wanted to avoid it at any cost. In a nursing home, they’d just forget about me, but I knew Julian would take care of me.
“Say something, Ronnie,” Julian begged me.
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll come live with you.”
Julian was so happy, he actually started crying. He hugged me at first, then he was kissing me on the mouth. I remember when we first met in that club, we were clawing at each other as we were making out. The passion sort of died down a little later on in our relationship, but now Julian was grabbing at me like he couldn’t control himself. “Hey,” I said, “we can’t do this here.”
As I said it, I realized that those words didn’t sound much like the old me. The old me, before I was a quad, would have fucked anyone anywhere anytime. That was how my dad wound up catching me fucking a guy in his living room. I was a bad kid, I know it. But now I had too much respect for this place to do something that was such a big violation of rules. I think I was becoming more grown up, in some ways. And I think for me especially, that was a really good thing. Now that I was a quad, I had to be more mature and more focused if I wanted to accomplish my goals.
“Let me take you somewhere so I can molest you,” Julian said as he bit my earlobe.
I laughed. “You’ve got our whole lives to molest me.” That was a really mature statement for someone like me and I think Julian appreciated it.
“That’s true,” he agreed, although he kept kissing me and undid some buttons on my shirt, which he managed to do up again before Fran came back into the room.
“Are you ready to continue with your therapy?” Fran asked me when she came back.
“Sure,” I said.
Julian stood up and held out his hand to her. “I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself formally to you before. My name is Julian LaRoche. Ronnie and I have just made arrangement for him to come live with me after he’s finished with rehabilitation.”
Fran’s eyes lit up. She always wanted the best thing for me. “That’s fantastic, Mr. LaRoche! You know, Ronnie’s own parents aren’t even willing to take him in.”
When she said that, I smiled to myself. I knew my parents were told what happened to me and knowing my dad, he probably decided it wasn’t worth helping me. Actually, I can imagine my dad being really happy I got crippled like this because he thought I deserved terrible things to happen to me and he probably hoped I’d wind up in some dump nursing home. I was glad I’d have a chance to show him I could actually do something with my life.
Julian smiled at Fran, his usual charming self. “Would it be all right if I brought Ronnie back to his room now? There are matters we need to discuss.”
“Certainly!” Fran said. She put her hand on my shoulder. “Ronnie, you just tell your uncle to come find me when you’re done talking.”
Talking. Yeah, right. That was the last thing Julian had in mind for us.
I wanted to show Julian that I could use the controls on the armrest to move the wheelchair by myself, but I was so excited I was having trouble doing it. Julian just laughed and pushed the controls himself to get me back to my room.
Back in my room, Julian locked the door right when we got in. I was pretty psyched about what was about to happen, but the truth was I kind of missed Ned. When Julian first came to see me, all I could think about was getting his dick in my mouth, but now I kept thinking about Ned every once in a while. I felt sort of bad, like I was cheating on him.
Julian just picked me up and put me down in my bed. I was pretty light, considering most of my muscle was gone. I probably lost at least thirty pounds since I got injured and I was skinny to begin with. Julian started pulling all my clothes off and I couldn’t do a whole lot to help him. When he was getting my shirt off, I kept trying to help him by moving my arm, but I think I wound up making it harder. He got me completely naked—no shirt, pants, underwear, and he even pulled my socks off. The only thing left was the catheter in my dick and my legbag. “Will you piss yourself if I take this out?” Julian asked me.
“I might,” I said hesitantly. “Probably not.”
I guess Julian thought “probably not” was too high a risk, so he left it in. Once I was lying there all naked, Julian started pulling his own clothes off. I always thought Julian had a decent body for a guy in his forties, but after looking at my own body and even Ned’s, wow he looked good. I found myself grinning real wide.
“What are you smiling about?” Julian asked me.
“Nothing,” I said. “Just happy, that’s all.”
Julian stroked my skinny arm. “God, you’re crippled, Ronnie.”
“I know.”
He picked up my hand and played with my fingers a little. “Does it bother you?” I asked him.
“Does it bother you that you’re completely at my mercy?” Julian replied.
I smiled wider. “No. I like it.”
“That’s good,” Julian whispered in my ear, “because I’m about to violate your poor crippled body, you fucking gimp.”
Julian kept his word. He must’ve rubbed himself against every part of my body. He used my hands, my feet, everything. He turned me over and fucked me in the ass for a little while, then he finally came all over my face. He loves doing that.
As Julian cleaned off my face with tissues, I thought maybe he should call Jason to come give me a bath. Then I had the thought that maybe Jason could teach Julian how to bathe me. I smiled at the thought of Julian watching Jason give me a sponge bath. I wondered if Julian would be able to control himself.
Julian looked kind of thoughtful and I suddenly got a little nervous. What if after fucking me Julian had changed his mind about wanting to take care of me? “What’s wrong?” I asked him.
“Nothing.” Julian stroked the side of my face. “I was just thinking about what life is going to be like for us.”
“So what are you thinking?”
“I want a real relationship with you, Ronnie,” Julian said. “I know you couldn’t give me that before, because you were too caught up in sex and getting high. But that was what I always wanted with you. And now I’d like us to try to have a mature adult relationship.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Julian began, “I don’t want it just to be about sex. I want to have someone that I can share a pleasant meal with. Someone I can discuss my day with. Do you think you’re ready for something like that, Ron?”
I wondered if I was. He was right that I never would have done that before I was disabled. But I think I had grown up a lot since then, especially in the last few weeks. I was surprised to realize that I now wanted that sort of relationship too. “I think so, Julian,” I said.
Julian smiled and he hugged me. I have to say, I felt really great right about now, maybe for the first time ever. My life was actually falling into place. It didn’t matter that I was a quadriplegic, because I felt like I had everything in the world. I’m a really lucky guy.